After Synod? Avoid anger
Bracing for the reflexive kick of this year's Synod.
When the Christian Reformed Church’s Synod 2023 makes its decisions, it will be like a rubber mallet smacking a reflex point. For some people, there will be joy. For others, an angry kick.
A reflex is a short-circuit nerve pattern that causes a leg to jump when the knee is struck. Reflex does not require any thinking. I herniated my spinal disk about L-4. My doctor was about to whack me with the rubber mallet on the knee when I said, “Doc, it’s not much, but I might kick you hard.” Good thing he moved out of the way.
When it comes to Synod, I’m speaking not of nerves but of old habits, old patterns of behavior, old ways of speaking and thinking. How do you protect yourself from the reflexive kick? Be smart like my doctor and stand aside, anticipating that some people may lash out. You can’t stop the reflex, but you can choose to not respond in anger.
Discuss the kinds of reflexive responses found in your congregation. Some will be angry and hurt. Some will be triumphant – which is just as much a kick. Talk to people about how they might feel as they see changes coming to the congregation. Encourage humility.
Avoid poking your church friends on their reflex points. Pray for your friends who disagree; invite them to lunch. Listen. Assure them you respect their opinion. Seek out the people who are hurt. Comfort them, even if they are unwilling to restore the original relationship. When Jesus told us there was a price to pay for becoming a disciple, one of those prices is humility. Go, find the hurt brothers and sisters, and bring peace.
