A web of connection
On our human longing for friendship – and for God.
Technology is, in Andy Crouch’s memorable phrase, “easy everywhere.” Most people I know struggle at some level to regulate time spent online. Our devices lure us, seeming to offer an escape from uncomfortable feelings like boredom, pain, awkwardness and uncertainty. That is no wonder, when the makers of apps and online platforms actively look for ways to draw and keep our attention. The term Attention Economy was first used by Herbert A. Simon in the 1960s. In current usage, it refers to the ways companies work to capture our attention, then profit from it via advertisements and data collection.
Already 30 years ago, Hazel Henderson expressed concern about the problem of the exploitative Attention Economy. In her book Building a Win-Win World, she wrote, “It would be useful if economics, which studies scarce means applied to supposedly infinite wants, switched its focus from money to studying the ultimate scarcity for humans: their time and attention.” Today, many of us know what it feels like to be at a computer or looking at a phone screen, unable to pull our attention away, or else stuck in task-switching mode, losing track of time and compromising responsibilities “in real life.”
The United Nations sets some boundaries
As I researched material for this article, I was interested to learn that attempts are being made to address the problem. Several organizations – including the United Nations – have together identified and advocated for a list of 10 Universal Conscious Attention Economy Principles. The principle of “attention literacy,” for example, says that individuals should be taught how their attention is being directed so that they can make informed decisions about how they participate online, and companies ought to be transparent about their intentions when it comes to digital offerings.
It is encouraging to realize that the problem is starting to be addressed at a macro level. What can you and I do simultaneously on a smaller scale? I suspect that all of us are aware of reasons our current trajectory is harmful. Many of us know what we ought to do: put the phone down, go outside, be mindful. But how to make changes? How to face the daunting and difficult hurdle of habit change?
Life to the full
First, maybe we need a vision for a fuller, richer life. In her book In Good Time, Jen Pollock Michel says that, “a fruitful life, according to the whole story of the Bible, is a life of belonging and connection, contingency and love.” Social media offers threads of connection, but those fibres snap easily if they are not part of an embodied web woven of thick, sturdy in-person connections. We are a lonely society. Forming real, personal friendships is never easy and seems to become more difficult with age. But the small steps that potentially lead to friendship are worth the discomfort, risk and vulnerability that they require. “Belonging and connection, contingency and love” require multi-dimensional, in-real-life human relationships.
Second, we can set specific parameters for technology use. Andy Crouch has a marvellous little book called The Tech-Wise Family in which he outlines 10 intentional commitments households can take to limit the pull of technology. Making such commitments together allows for mutual support and accountability. One commitment that has worked well for my family is to put devices away an hour before bedtime and to turn the internet off overnight.
‘Breezes of grace’
I have a third suggestion. When we wholeheartedly surrender to God, he can transform the way we spend our time and attention. We who follow Christ are indwelt by his very Spirit. We sometimes underestimate that gift. As we submit to the promptings of the Spirit, we can experience a deep sense of love and connection. We can also experience unspoken but real guidance in our day-to-day lives, becoming receptive to each breeze of the Spirit. This has been a reality for many Christians through the history of the church. In the 12th century, Hildegard of Bingen referred to herself as “a feather on the breath of God,” yielded to and directed by him. In the 18th century, Jean-Pierre de Caussade used a similar image, describing a soul yielded to God as being “light as a feather,” affected by God’s every nudging breeze of grace.
De Caussade’s ideas are collected in a book called Abandonment to Divine Providence. He encouraged those under his spiritual direction to joyfully surrender themselves, moment by moment, to a good God who was present with them at all times. Over the past few months, I have tried to do this, and I have found decisions getting easier. When facing a decision (even a minor one), my default has been to do a rapid evaluation in my head of “pros” and “cons.” One key criterion has been the answer to the question, “Do I want to do this?” When, instead, I ask, “Lord, is this what you want for me, and from me?” the answer comes more easily. I obey more quickly and live more lightly as a result. My time and attention are transformed.
We are in the midst of a societal crisis of attention, pushed and pulled toward distraction. Online offerings and interactions are not enough to meet our human needs for connection, love and belonging. In-person relationships require more of us than online connections but promise richer and more robust rewards. Even when such relationships are difficult to find, the Spirit of God meets us here and now, redeeming our time and our attention.
