A rare book on singleness
Review of "Surviving Christianity Unmarried" by Karissa Sovdi.
Surviving Christianity Unmarried: A Theology of Singleness that Isn’t Looking for Its curE
Karissa Sovdi
Word Alive, 2025.
Karissa Sovdi’s Surviving Christianity Unmarried is a rare book on singleness that left me feeling genuinely seen. At first I dreaded another Christian book on singlehood: well-meaning clichés and shallow encouragements that feel galaxies away from the lived experience of being single in the church.
Sovdi’s uniquely invitational work disarmed my hesitation. Her writing is warm, witty, approachable and often laugh-out-loud funny. Even deeper, the book is unflinchingly honest and brave enough to touch tender places we rarely let anyone see.
“I can assure you this was not written from the comfort of a white-picketed home with a husband, 1.8 kids, and a dog,” Sovdi begins. “I’m single. As single as they come!”
She names an awkward reality: many books on singleness in the church are written from the safe distance of marriage and family life.
Sovdi writes: “Singleness is not a problem to be solved. It is a life to be lived.” I wanted to highlight, underline and maybe embroider that on a pillow!
A gift in itself
Too often singleness is treated as “less than.” Sovdi flips a familiar question: “What if God has more for me than marriage?”
Her words stirred memories. In my twenties, feeling so much shame about being single, I considered agreeing to Indian arranged-marriage matchmaking as the only way forward! When Sovdi writes about the unspoken expectations, I get it. I’ve lived it.
With candid, theological and biblical reflections, she calls us to rethink frameworks about sex, purity and identity. Worth is not measured by marital status or sexual activity, but by Christ’s redeeming love: “If we want to share the love and freedom of Jesus, and if we ever want singles to find true community in our midst, we must not shame them.”
At its heart, this isn’t just about surviving singlehood – it’s about discipleship: “Can you lay your hopes on the altar and trust him with the result? Will you obey regardless?”
A lifeline
For pastors, leaders, and all who dare speak into the lives of single Christians, Surviving Christianity Unmarried unsettles easy clichés, dismantles harmful frameworks, and opens up a more gracious, Christ-centered vision of community.
For those of us who are single, Sovdi’s voice is a lifeline. We are not broken, incomplete or waiting to start “real” lives. Our lives happen here and now – loved, redeemed and held by God.
This book is a gift for the whole church.
